Sunday, September 04, 2005

So Tired of Hating.

Hate working just for the money.
Hate smiling just to keep everyone else happy.
Hate living someone else’s dream.
Hate worrying about what’s gonna happen to me.
Hate worrying about what’s gonna happen to my family if I do what I want to do and just leave.

Hate me in Dubai.

24 comments:

KJ said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
KJ said...

As they'd say sometimes in a hindi movie" kabhi kabhi doosron ke liye jeena padta hai" ( sometimes u have to live smile for other's happiness)

god bless

have a nice day

Rahul said...

i dont agree!
u are inevitably poorer if you live somebody else' dream. U may have to work for the money, smile to kep someone happy but all in the hope of a better tomorrow; a tomorrow where you could pursue life on your terms. I believe that should be central, the existential objective... Your family fundamentally wants you happy; that's what makes them family. I can tell you how big a decision grad school was for me, when everything was so cosy in Mumbai, but i realised it was my passion and my life's worth lay locked in my courage to stand up for it and see it through!

Sonia said...

rahul not everyone's parents think the same way. My parents love me a lot, no denying that. But they don't know me at all. I love them too, and understand they are trying hard in their own way. But the fact remains that they don't know what will make me happy. They only know what will make them happy and think that i'll be happy with the same things.

Sonia said...

btw rahul, what don't you agree to?

Rahul said...

to your hating it, but doing it all the same. To that demon of procrastination and self-doubt that tells us that our future is not for us to write...
Looks like i've woken up into an idealistic mood today ;-)

Sonia said...

seems like it!

Rahul said...

parents never realise their kids grow up, do they? They always treat u the same, as long as you dont display your maturity. They dont like the shock, nobody likes the change. But, when the waves settle iam sure it will be in a higher plane for them...

Joker said...

*hugs* sonia! right now relax and bide your time and then take the jump - to do what you would really want. following ones own dreams and getting it is the sweetest thing of all. take it from a person who has done it... left grad, med school entrance etc to graduate in theatre. lots of other stuff too. *HUGS* to you again! just hang in there girl and someday its going to happen within you! believe me!

Keshi said...

How about hating hate?

Keshi.

Kahini said...

Hang in there, earn the munny, prove to yourself you can take care of yourself... and then take off. That's the only reason to exist.

Sonia said...

keshi: too tired!

Kahini: that makes sense. ok. and Thank you!

n.g. said...

how come kahini makes sense only on other people's blogs?

Anonymous said...

yipeee. I am outa my mind, I got 10000 from postcard millionaire so i will share it with you. the news i mean, not the money

Keshi said...

Sonia ur tired of hating...so just stop hating or loving anything too much...be neutral to everything...I know it's hard but it can be achieved and once u do it's just pure bliss...ur on higher ground.

Keshi.

Sonia said...

nish: she makes sense EVERYWHERE!

anonymous: are u the same anonymous from the prev post?? it's so hard when people don't leave names. at least leave a fake name! congrats btw! 10,000 bucks! cool!

keshi: that would make me indifferent right? how wud that be better?

Mirage said...

Love to hate...?!

Keshi said...

nope it doesnt make u indifferent...it gives u a good balance of both emotions.

Keshi.

Rahul said...

hmmm... u need not have deleted it. after all, we are your shrinks; and dont worry about it! The firmer you are with him, the better it will be for both of you...

Saltwater Blues said...

Kahini is right. hope ur doin ok.

100hands said...

Love, sex, pain, confusion, suffering
You're there crying, I feel not a thing
Drilling my way deeper in your head
Sinking, draining, drowning, bleeding, dead

- - -
thats what dubai says to us.

Lost in trance... said...

"smiling just to keep everyone else happy."
Never. Please.

Sonia said...

lost in trance:i wish i didn't have to, but parents aren't happy with the same things we are, and i've lived for myself, for the past two years when i was in delhi. and sometimes smiling for others' isn't so bad. you should see how happy thee become!

Lost in trance... said...

"parents aren't happy with the same things we are"
More close u r to them, nore difficult it gets...And there aint no easy way to change it.

Smiling for the sake of smiling, for me, is like cheating yourself. Y wudyu ever wanna do that?