You must marry him.
Dad, I don't like him.
(I don't like anybody who tells me that my mother is right about the fact that this is the right time for me to get married cos otherwise I "will be in trouble" and that "we are Indians, moreover Keralites", and that we are "bound by our culture".
He is educated, good looking, and working as a researcher in Germany. What else do you want?
(Someone who doesn't think that I am bound by my culture perhaps? ) I don't like him daddy, I don't want to get married to him.
What are your intentions? I'm grwing old, I'm sick of people asking me why you are not getting married... you know the drill.
God help me!
I make mistakes. I learn. And finally, move onto other things. I'm only human. And I'm learning to live. Just like everyone else.
Monday, July 31, 2006
Sunday, July 30, 2006
If it's not one thing, it's another
This great trip of mine is riddled with issues.
The main one being that I haven't yet told my folks about it!
If they knew I was spending this much money in a week to "take a break", especially to a place where hundreds of people only recently died of bomb attacks by terrorists, they would probably lock me up and throw away the key!
I've been advised to tell that I'm going on a business trip. Which is pretty believable since I actually deal with the Indian subcontinent as far as work is concerned.
But I suck at lying to mum.
She gives me 'the Look' that all Mums seem to be so good at, the one that makes you feel like every single thought in your head is written in Bold Arial size 72 on your face! :o(
I just give up and end up telling her the truth usually.
But then I imagine telling them the truth and I can see my mum's face break into tears and my dad going all stony faced and angry... followed by them yelling that I will do "no such thing".
On how I am a Keralite and a girl and why can't I be more like other girls and get married to the nice researcher in Germany ( who is boring as hell, trust me!)
That's just the parents.
Bombay itself, is proving to be tricky.
Ah well, one problem at a time I guess.
The main one being that I haven't yet told my folks about it!
If they knew I was spending this much money in a week to "take a break", especially to a place where hundreds of people only recently died of bomb attacks by terrorists, they would probably lock me up and throw away the key!
I've been advised to tell that I'm going on a business trip. Which is pretty believable since I actually deal with the Indian subcontinent as far as work is concerned.
But I suck at lying to mum.
She gives me 'the Look' that all Mums seem to be so good at, the one that makes you feel like every single thought in your head is written in Bold Arial size 72 on your face! :o(
I just give up and end up telling her the truth usually.
But then I imagine telling them the truth and I can see my mum's face break into tears and my dad going all stony faced and angry... followed by them yelling that I will do "no such thing".
On how I am a Keralite and a girl and why can't I be more like other girls and get married to the nice researcher in Germany ( who is boring as hell, trust me!)
That's just the parents.
Bombay itself, is proving to be tricky.
Ah well, one problem at a time I guess.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Family Ties
There's this friend of mine at work.
She's a Muslim and she's in love with a Hindu guy.
Her parents don't approve. ( of course! So what else is new!)
She's 25 years old, and the man she's in love with is 27. They're both working, and they're both of sound mind and body and perfectly capable of taking care of themselves.
But they can't marry unless her parents agree.
Why?
Cos of the law. Indian law.
Apparently, as long as a person is an NRI and under the sponsership of his or her parents, then they will require a no-objection letter of the parents in order to get married. Even if they are in India.
The guy in question is under his employer's sponsership, but the girl is sponsered by her father. (fyi, the guy's parents are actually okay with the girl and have actually agreed to try and talk to her parents to get them to agree. But her parents aren't exactly the kind who'll listen.)
She cannot change her sponsership unless her present sponser (her father) agrees to it.
So she's stuck and has no idea what to do.
Did I mention her parents have hidden her passport?
She's a Muslim and she's in love with a Hindu guy.
Her parents don't approve. ( of course! So what else is new!)
She's 25 years old, and the man she's in love with is 27. They're both working, and they're both of sound mind and body and perfectly capable of taking care of themselves.
But they can't marry unless her parents agree.
Why?
Cos of the law. Indian law.
Apparently, as long as a person is an NRI and under the sponsership of his or her parents, then they will require a no-objection letter of the parents in order to get married. Even if they are in India.
The guy in question is under his employer's sponsership, but the girl is sponsered by her father. (fyi, the guy's parents are actually okay with the girl and have actually agreed to try and talk to her parents to get them to agree. But her parents aren't exactly the kind who'll listen.)
She cannot change her sponsership unless her present sponser (her father) agrees to it.
So she's stuck and has no idea what to do.
Did I mention her parents have hidden her passport?
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Freakin out
Sometimes you won't know why you're upset.
You just know you are.
It's like your subconscious state of mind understands what is wrong and you react emotionally to it, but you're not really aware what it is that upsets you so much till much later.
It's like that for me now.
I'm confused and upset and close to freaking out.
I need to clear my head. and the only one I know who can make sense and calm me down is my N, my best friend.
So I've decided.
I'm going to India, for a verrrry short break. But a break, nonetheless.
And till then, I'll just keep praying.
You just know you are.
It's like your subconscious state of mind understands what is wrong and you react emotionally to it, but you're not really aware what it is that upsets you so much till much later.
It's like that for me now.
I'm confused and upset and close to freaking out.
I need to clear my head. and the only one I know who can make sense and calm me down is my N, my best friend.
So I've decided.
I'm going to India, for a verrrry short break. But a break, nonetheless.
And till then, I'll just keep praying.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Saturday, July 08, 2006
Leo: Turbulent and unexpected month ahead.. Damn right!
Some guy is gonna come to "see"me today.
And there's nothing I can do about it other than refuse to serve him tea (or any other beverage).
I've had a million fights with my mum about this of course.
It's become a routine now, she starts talking about a guy who seems "marriage material" and I get irritated and then we're off.
" Ma will you please leave me alone. I can make my own decisions."
"You're not getting any younger, ALL of your friends are married and some even have kids. What about you? How do you plan on living by yourself? You'll be singled out, you'll be all alone. You can't live like that, what will I tell everyone else when they ask me why you're still single, it is unheard of in our family, I cannot bear to talk to anyone now, everyone is asking me why I'm not getting you married off... "
I'm a disgrace to my family. Being 25 and unmarried is the worst thing that could happen to a girl apprently.
Sigh!
I've explained it to her a million times already! I can't do this.
But she still nags, worries and keeps surfing matrimonial sites.
And now they want me to meet this guy tonight.
I DON'T WANT TO MEET ANYONE LIKE THIS!
I can't explain why, cos I know that a lot of people meet this way and get married and they're fine or whatever. But when anyone tries to set me up like this, it depresses me.
I know that "everyone else does it"and that "it's not such a big deal" but it IS a big deal for ME.
Cos this is not what I want. I'm not really sure what I want, but it's not this.
I'm feeling irritated, worried, angry, alone, and so damn depressed.
I need a break. I neeed to take a break off of all this and just get up and go somewhere where my parents won't keep nagging me like this. I need to clear my head a bit.
I think I'm gonna ask my boss for a week off and go to India and be with my friends.
Let's see.
And there's nothing I can do about it other than refuse to serve him tea (or any other beverage).
I've had a million fights with my mum about this of course.
It's become a routine now, she starts talking about a guy who seems "marriage material" and I get irritated and then we're off.
" Ma will you please leave me alone. I can make my own decisions."
"You're not getting any younger, ALL of your friends are married and some even have kids. What about you? How do you plan on living by yourself? You'll be singled out, you'll be all alone. You can't live like that, what will I tell everyone else when they ask me why you're still single, it is unheard of in our family, I cannot bear to talk to anyone now, everyone is asking me why I'm not getting you married off... "
I'm a disgrace to my family. Being 25 and unmarried is the worst thing that could happen to a girl apprently.
Sigh!
I've explained it to her a million times already! I can't do this.
But she still nags, worries and keeps surfing matrimonial sites.
And now they want me to meet this guy tonight.
I DON'T WANT TO MEET ANYONE LIKE THIS!
I can't explain why, cos I know that a lot of people meet this way and get married and they're fine or whatever. But when anyone tries to set me up like this, it depresses me.
I know that "everyone else does it"and that "it's not such a big deal" but it IS a big deal for ME.
Cos this is not what I want. I'm not really sure what I want, but it's not this.
I'm feeling irritated, worried, angry, alone, and so damn depressed.
I need a break. I neeed to take a break off of all this and just get up and go somewhere where my parents won't keep nagging me like this. I need to clear my head a bit.
I think I'm gonna ask my boss for a week off and go to India and be with my friends.
Let's see.
Sunday, July 02, 2006
Unexpected
I don't care for football. And I usually steer clear of astrologers.
But I happened to listen to this show on the radio where they have weekly horoscopes and predictions based on numerology. Apparently, this is a turbulent time for everyone in general and a lot of expect the unexpected-ness could be expected.
They also proved how, numerologically, Brazil should win the world cup this year.
So gullible me ( see this is why I steer clear of astrology, I believe too easily!) ended up betting with my dad (who is a football freak) and now I need to treat my family to lunch at Chili's.
If this is the beginning of this unexpected and turbulent month, then I'm screwed!
But I happened to listen to this show on the radio where they have weekly horoscopes and predictions based on numerology. Apparently, this is a turbulent time for everyone in general and a lot of expect the unexpected-ness could be expected.
They also proved how, numerologically, Brazil should win the world cup this year.
So gullible me ( see this is why I steer clear of astrology, I believe too easily!) ended up betting with my dad (who is a football freak) and now I need to treat my family to lunch at Chili's.
If this is the beginning of this unexpected and turbulent month, then I'm screwed!
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